A bit of this is inspired by Frank's poem "What's Gonna
Happen?"
You sheltered me in your darkness,
Invited me in when I became lonely and empty
It soon became too bright outside
I couldn't withstand the sun's glare
Or the mocking faces of the others
Your shadows embraced me in a protective cloak
As you hissed at prodding children,
Baring ivory fangs that dared them hungrily
I didn't understand your disturbed nature
Until I grew up a little,
Up and over you and our relationship
I always thought you were taking care of me
You always seemed to be so vigilant and sensitive
about my feelings
But it wasn't always so
At times I pondered about your vicious intentions
And prayed they weren't true
A few years into our demonic love,
I began to realize your true colors
And wanted to tear away your falsified appearance
Times where you'd once hold me tightly
On some kind of "love-high"
Became moments of forced smiles and lies
So I had enough of it,
I wanted you to see me and have all of me
I was on the bathroom floor,
And held a scalpel in one hand as the other brushed back my hair
To reveal a naked breast
You stared at me intently, drilling holes into my body
And I began to cut my heart out,
Which I held out to you as a peace offering
I wanted the lies to stop growing,
For you to take me in all that I was,
The way it should have been
You grimly frowned and thanked me with your eyes
As you stepped around the puddle of thick, red mess,
Leaving me to weep in my misery, in my blood and
tears
For days I couldn't eat or sleep
I could hardly breathe, either,
You meant for this all along,
You prescribed me a bit of your artificial loving
That I carelessly took, to get that "love-high"
You always seemed to be hyped up about
But in a sense, I overdosed
On it, on you
You occasionally showed up at my place of work,
Bumping into me at supermarkets or clothing stores
Each time with that filthy whore clinging to your arm,
Always making me wonder what you saw in her
I watched her choose a pair of frilly lingerie
And it made me think about her going home to you,
Wearing the stupid thing, prancing about like the slut she so clearly was,
For she slept around behind your back, tended to men
in the late hours of the night
Fuck,
I sound like a stalker,
Excuse me, mind if I smoke?
-pulls out a cigarette and lights-
You used to smoke all the time,
Now I only do it when I think of you, of us
But I'm assuming that was your point, to tear me
inside and out
And even when I offered you what little of me I had
left,
You seemed disgusted
As if you could no longer play the game you had
convinced me
Was real, as if you couldn't stand the sight
Of the girl you once "loved"
Or whatever it was
Infatuation? Lust?
It was sickening, the sorry excuse for affection you had
You knew I wouldn't be able to stand alone
You left me very much unstable
And had treated me like your dark princess
In a gloomy palace,
Where I'd learn to become codependent by default
And even now I can barely stand the thought of myself
Due to you and your disappearing,
In and out of my life
Popping up when you felt need be,
You knew you were hurting me
And you left me, to fend for myself in the sunlight,
But it's alright
My new lover has sworn our bond to secrecy,
A magic poison sealing our fate to each other,
Putting our lives in each others hands
He strengthens me in his light,
Invites me out when I become dark and lurid
I soak in all the brightness
And welcome in the sun's glare
And the childishly amusing faces of the others
His radiance embraces me in a glorifying gown,
As he smiles at curious children,
Baring his heart on his sleeve that speak to them lovingly
And for once,
My whole world has been illuminated,
As it should be
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