Blank.

Posted by captainlemonberry | Posted in , , , | Posted on 10:43 PM

1

There was something different about him
He was a strange thing, and when I saw him,
I couldn't help but take interest
I wanted him inside me,
And I kindly welcomed him in
The first few encounters were only on weekends
Over time, he began to accompany me on weekdays,
when I was exhausted and lonely
He was kind enough to let me use him;
by this time we were both aware of the situation
I had become addicted to him
Friends of mine even shared the little crush,
But with time, they irritated me
I wanted him all to myself
Months passed,
I met a boy
He spoke to me about a love I felt I had once known
"What is it?" He asked
I told him of my broken heart, torn up by the lover before
I whispered the monster's name,
Alcohol...
the boy shook his head and left
Around the same day every year,
Every time I turn a year older,
I open up my cabinet and stare at you
With your many forms and different bodies...
...but all one in the same,
And every year,
I close that door
And cry over my lost love

Just Stuff

Posted by captainlemonberry | Posted in , , , , , , | Posted on 9:03 PM

0

You slept with golden curls

Surrounded by the light

My darkened hair unfurled

And welcomed in the night

Porcelain skin played innocent

Humility had been your tool

Though the parents were quite impudent,

It was you who played the fool

Though rumors mainly spoke of

Fragile hands and a soul compelled

You were wicked and full of hate

Darker than the night itself


Constantly a game of war
Hands and fingers pulling
At each others hair and clothes
Eyes burning deep holes into one another
And legs kicking about
Tangled up together
In an awkward display of affection
and a loss for words
In the weird language
Our lips speak in
Like a secret the heart keeps from the mind
And you bite my lip
On impulse, rather
You sir are sleeping with the enemy
Who will not go down
Without a fight
Take my tanks if you must
Take my army if you will
Take my luck and good fortune if you can
But do not take my heart
For that is the one thing
You cannot have just yet


He had cuts on his hands
Burns on his arms
Needn't to hide them
Battle scars from better days
They didn't hurt,
These constant reminders,
They kept him strong
They kept him sane
Although bruised and beaten
He trudged on through the remains
Of old friends and old memories
Of what was and what will be
I was not as strong
A broken hand, an aching heart
Laying lifelessly beneath a willow
Drowning in my own tears
Then he saved me
Picked me up and carried me
I tossed and turned
Kicked and screamed
When I realized escaping
Was not in question
The silence in the air
Hung heavy between us
With his lips against mine
And our hands interlocked
I could feel him
*Pulsing through my veins


*I seem to like that phrase a lot...oh well...

Yellow

Posted by captainlemonberry | Posted in , , , , | Posted on 7:17 PM

1

I s t o o d i n f r o n t o f m y b r a n d n e w m i r r o r . . .

And looked at the girl who looked back at me
She seemed desperate and in need of a cut
So I promised myself that I'd make her bleed
Reaching for the scissors on my desk,
My thumb slid against the blades
She had her fill of innocence;
It was sin she'd been wanting to taste
My empty hand ran down her thigh,
And she stood there, so lost and alone
She needed to feel what I wanted to give
For contrition was all she had known
While the scissors worked to free
The long, flowing hair that framed her face,
She closed her eyes and held her breath
As my fingers explored her secret place
A few minutes passed by with eerie silence
Until the floor was covered with hair
I ran my hand through her short boy cut
And stopped just so I could stare
I tiredly gave her a look of regret
And buttoned up the clothes I'd undone
Y o u w a n t s o m e t h i n g t o b e p r o u d o f ,
And I forget that I'm a someone

Blue

Posted by captainlemonberry | Posted in , , | Posted on 7:08 PM

0

t h e s o f t b u z z i n g o f a f l y e c h o e s i n y o u r e a r .. .

It snags your attention, and you turn your head briefly
The daftly painted pastel walls, you’ve been told, are meant to calm your nerves,
But as you sit in the man-made pseudo-serenity,
You can hear the “peaceful” walls turn into obscure hindrances,
Throwing every insult possible at you
A couple seated several chairs down from you converses clandestinely
You close your eyes as the wind carries their voices
Down the aisles towards you,
And you hear their every conundrum
Not wanting to procure prompt visions of
A familiar, staggeringly failing lifestyle you had so lovingly forgotten
And supposedly left in your past,
You try to shut them out and lock the door
The smell of your cheap perfume temporarily satisfies
The neurotic sentiment burning your insides
Right about now you’re itching for a cigarette,
Anything to take your mind off of this place and these people
In your mind, you reminisce about good times,
But your self-repulsion interrupts the joyous nostalgia,
And like a filthy whore,
Shame opens its lewd legs for you
And coaxes you with a desperate, erotic moan
Your eyelids flicker open to the boring, hopeless world around you
Anxiety, you're scared
You begin to get up,
Past the couple,
Past the receptionist,
Out of the hospital,
Oblivious to the calls of the confused nurses
Calling attention to your wounded hand,
Bloody, broken, beaten, unwilling
But you don't turn around
You don't come back
You run,
Run,
Run,
You run in your disgust
And your self-loathe
You run,
Until the hospital
Becomes one with the horizon

Green

Posted by captainlemonberry | Posted in , , , , , | Posted on 5:15 PM

0

G r e e n g r a s s , f r e s h l y m o w e d . . .

The sky’s not alone today; the birds are out chirping
I sit on my wooden bench, alone, away from the others
They don’t talk to me, or each other
The voices tell them to, so they keep their distance
I don’t mind; I’ve grown accustomed to the silence
The flowers stick out of the ground like constant reminders of the outside world
I cringe a little, but I know they’re there for good intentions
Looking around, I smile as the sun’s hands warm my face and soul
Then a sudden jolt shoots through my body,
And the familiar burn makes me twitch
Since your absence, you’ve grown stronger
You pulse through my veins,
And I stand up to get help,
But your supernatural force flings me against a nearby fence
My body thrashes about madly as I hook my fingers in the little, metal diamonds,
Holding on for dear life
Peripheral vision; the others stand there like an audience, and I’m the show
They’ve been told not to dirty their hands with me
By the voices I can’t ever seem to hear
Nurses arrive belatedly, and one is armed with a thin needle
Pinched between her gloved fingers
You throw me against them,
And the nurse, armed and deadly, stabs my arm violently,
And the sedative overpowers your temporary control
You’ve had your fun for the day
My drugged state of mind doesn’t allow me to move my arms,
Control my body
And two gloved hands grab my wrists and drag me across the ground to the building
As the freaks around me stare in awe
This little incident…
I hear them say outside my room
…she can’t go outside anymore.
Disappointed, but unable to show emotion, I lay in my bed
And stare at my white walls
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